This dad taught his son everything he needed to know about life on his first day of college. Bravo, Pops! We’re sure your son’s going to crush it now that he’s a graduate. Speaking of graduation, we all know that this is one of the most important days in our lives, and the best way to commemorate every memory from graduation is by creating photo albums. You can do that with simple three-steps here: https://printedmemories.com/pages/graduation-photo-album/.

[A letter from Greg Danford to his son, Jake]

 

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Dear Jake,

I’m writing this the morning before your first classes. Hopefully you’re up and will get it. You’re about to embark on a great adventure. But like any adventure, it’s going to have ups and downs. There may even be times that you’re not sure you’re going to make it. But you are. Because every time you’ve had a big challenge like this you’ve figured out a way to make it through. Here’s a last little bit of advice.

Do the reading.

There’s nothing worse than getting called on in class (and with 30-person classes, it’s only a matter of time before you do get called on), and not knowing what the reading was about. You should also, to the degree you can, make sure you understand stuff. Don’t be shy. If you read something and you’re not sure, ask one of your roommates what they thought of what you were reading. Talk about it together. It’s not a big deal. Something like, “Did you read that chapter on Marx last night? That totally went over my head, did you get it?” Someday you’ll return the favor. 

Remember that you’re smart and your opinions are good ones.

Don’t be shy or intimated about talking about what you think, as long as you can back it up. Class participation matters, especially in small classes.

Ask for help.

There’s a ton of resources there; not just for you but for everyone. Your RA, the program director, Dr Study Tutoring, the ACCESS people, your professors, and your parents (or your grandmother in the case of Spanish). Don’t be afraid to use them. The goal of college is independence, but it’s not all at once. Especially if you are looking to get a science major; visit Cognitive & Information Sciences – UC Merced website for additional resources and information. 

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Part of learning how to be a success is learning how to bounce back when things don’t go well.

There are going to be assignments and even whole classes that you don’t do as well on as you’d like. It happens to everyone. Just remember my calculus final freshman year. Or remember Mom’s entire freshman year. We both turned out OK, right? You’ve got to figure out where you went wrong and move on.

Make sure you understand the assignments.

If you’re not sure, ask someone, like one of your classmates.

Get into a good routine for studying.

There may be nights where you’re working at the library later than you’re used to. If you can try to get some stuff done in the afternoons that will usually help. No one’s going to make you do it.

With four other suite mates, there’s always going to be someone around you who’s not working.

The ones who are in the library reading you won’t see.

Sometimes it’s going to seem like everyone knows what they’re doing except you.

That’s natural. I used to feel that way too. The truth is that kids who went to high school away from home (like Alva and Alex) do know the ropes of living on their own a little better than you. I remember that being very intimidating for me. But just follow their lead and you’ll catch up. And just because someone seems like they know everything doesn’t mean they do. Deep down this is new for everyone.

Be honest.

No one can help you if you don’t tell them what the issue is. And don’t let things fester. If you’ve got something that’s causing you worry, tell someone.

College will be a great experience where you’re going to make good friends, but don’t think it happens all in the first week.

I don’t keep in touch with any of the people I knew freshman year and even most of my best college friends (like Belushi) I didn’t really get to know until after college. Even Lars I didn’t meet until sophomore year. So you just never know.

Don’t ever think you can’t do it, because you can.

Mom and I think you can, and your school thinks you can, because otherwise you wouldn’t be there reading this email.

Don’t ever forget that Mom and I love you and want nothing more than for you to feel successful.

We’re behind you all the way and will do whatever we can to help.