Dear Patrick.

This is you, from the future. I know you might think that’s complete nonsense, but if it was, how would I know about your secret penchant for sparkly unicorn designs or the crush you had on Madeleine Albright that you told nobody about. See? It’s me. And you are in for a treat, because just a short few years from now you are going to still be mega-handsome and you’ll be very wealthy.

Just kidding, you’ll be a bit heavier and still broke as you’ve always been. But clearly I still have our sense of humor, so we have that going for us. I’m here to give you some simple tips on ways to improve. I know, I know.”How can you improve upon the utter perfection that is…. Us?” I guess improve is the wrong word. We need to talk about maintenance, and believe me, you’re going to need it. You make some bad decisions in the near future. Nothing major. You’re not responsible for too many fiascos and you’ve had to make surprisingly few public apologies in the coming years. But here are 3 things you might want to consider to make the next 20 years run a bit more smoothly.

You think you’re in decent shape…… you’re not.

Right now you’re doing well with exercise and your body can handle that deplorable diet. But I’m here to let you know that it’s going to catch up, and you’re not going to be aware of it for far too long. 30lb sandwiches from your local shops seem awesome right now. Eating them 5 days a week?….. Sure. Go for it. But one day you’re literally going to say these statements:

“I think I should switch detergents. All of my pants have shrunk from this one.”

“Man, why am I out of breath when I tie my shoes??”

“I don’t know why I’m sweating this much just from walking. It’s winter!”

Now we know why. You weren’t exercising nearly enough. I know our mentality was always “well, we’re not THAT bad.” But why do we want to settle for even moderately bad? Keep running. You can do so at an Active Mile Daily Track. Swim more. You’ll have more energy, you’ll feel better and you’ll look better. Oh! Your pants will magically stop “shrinking” too! Amazing how that works, stupid.

Money. You should consider saving some.

Here’s a thing that hasn’t changed for us in 20 years. An utter disregard for financial status’ and a dangerously callous attitude towards financial security. I figure this is something that’s never going to disappear for us. It’s been both bred into our consciousness by our ancestral attitude of Irish Martyrdom/ self imposed sacrifice, and reinforced with a youth spent fostering punk rock ideologies and starving-artist mentalities. Well here’s the thing. Saving some of your money is going to go a long way in making large swaths of your life considerably easier. It won’t take much. Just think about all the money you’re spending on DVDs. Well, pretty soon Netflix is going to happen. I know that means nothing to you now, but to future you, it means those thousands of dollars in disks are eating up precious garage space, and serve no purpose beyond nostalgic regret. Take that money. Put it away. Click here to Buy Gold now. Invest in literally anything other than movies you’re not going to watch.

Believe me, there are times ahead when you’ll need that loot desperately and not having it kind of sucks. Fortunately, there are services like same day loans in United Kingdom that can save you.

Your hair. It’s not working.

Look at you, you big handsome gent. Look at all of that glorious, flowing hair covering that considerable noggin of yours. You’re 20, so you’re rocking it long-ish now. In the summer it gets wonderfully blonde as you spend 12 hours a day in the sun. You’re able to Robert Smith it up to grande heights if you want to. You tie it up when you play sports, and soon…… it’s going to start abandoning you.

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20160919_18104820160919_180945It won’t be as sudden as some of your friends. It won’t be as drastic as your brother’s (guess which one!!), but you’ll find yourself getting lighter and lighter up top as the years pass. Your strategy is a solid one. You’re going to pretend nothing’s changed! For a while that will work. It’s not that you won’t notice, but you’ll think you have more up top than you do.  But, there will come a day when you look at yourself and think “this isn’t working”. Unfortunately you’ll come to that realization about 5 years after everyone else does. For now, I just cut it short and accept that I won’t have your beautiful locks. But you can do something about it that I didn’t!! You should consider Rogaine®. You see, the earlier you start using it, the better the results are. So once you start to notice that you’re getting Dad’s hairline, it’s time to start. 1474384702119It’s progressive, so the longer you wait, the less of a mop I’ll have up there. Why not keep that hair going as long as you can?? I mean, we’re still crazy handsome, but I’ll be honest, I’d probably be slightly handsomer with more hair. Hard to believe, right?? That’s why I always trust information from reliable sites – check this site

Here are some things you should know about Rogaine®.

  • Rogaine® treats Hereditary Hair Loss which is seen as thinning at the crown of the head
  • Hereditary hair loss is a progressive condition. If you don’t do something about it, you’ll continue to lose more and more hair over time
  • Rogaine® must be used twice a day, every day to maintain results

That’s about all I have for you. I’d get into some detail of what to expect, but we need to pay attention to Doc Brown and not mess with the Space Time Continuum. Too much info can screw everything up for us and others. But improving yourself can only do good.

You should be excited for things to come. You’ll have tons of adventures, you’ll see and experience things completely unexpected, live in new areas and *** Spoiler Alert *** you’ll love people that enter your life in ways you never even knew possible. That love will alter you in drastically glorious ways. You’ll know what I’m talking about when it comes. Until then, I hope you take my advice. Buuuuut, knowing 20 year old me like I do, you read the first paragraph and then went to the beach without the details. Ugh. You know what, Me?? You’re the worst sometimes.

Oh, and I’m totally kidding. That picture was from an App. An App is….. forget it. Too much to explain. You lose hair…. but not THAT much of it….. yet.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6N4vjsf6lIw

    • I have partnered with Life of Dad and Rogaine for this promotion.
    • As with any medicine or health product, please consult the product’s instructions and warnings before use.

Need to know where to find Men’s Rogaine® Unscented Foam? Follow the link below!

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