Experienced dads know that the hardest parts of fatherhood are not, despite the memes, the diaper years and the sleepness nights. We asked the amazing dads of our Facebook community to tell us what they are struggling with right now and here’s just a sample of the hundreds of responses.

Jamie Bryant: Hard? I’m not gonna sugarcoat it. None of it is easy. The stress of it sucks. The fact that you have human beings depending on you for everything. The stress. The sadness. The anger. Geez…so much more. Fatherhood is CARAZY! Wouldn’t trade it for anything!

Jeremy Burke: It’s different for everyone I guess. For me, it’s having a child with Duchenne muscular dystrophy. To watch your child struggle to do things normal kids do, like walk, climb stairs and just play, and to know he probably doesn’t have a lot of years to live, that’s the hardest part of fatherhood for me. Everything else seems almost irrelevant. But for my other children, I can’t make it irrelevant because they still have their lives to live also. It’s hard separating the two.

Mark Brislin: When you have to decide between being present in your child’s life versus providing for them. My industry isn’t very good on work-life balance.

David Silliman: That hardest part is seeing my wife struggle. It’s my job as dad/husband to put a side my struggles and be what I’m needed to be. My integrity depends on it, it’s what I signed up for.

Mischa Suemnig: Trying to play Shopkins with my daughter. It’s f**king groceries!?! We’re playing g0d damn groceries now?! How are we at a point with toys, that a grown man can say, without sarcasm, “I miss Beanie Babies.”

Jonathon Tittle: Being a single father of two little girls that I have full custody of and live with me at all times. I had no siblings growing up and no father so I feel like I’m lost most of the time just trying to figure out what to do next it’s a very scary feeling.

Michael Knott: Teaching my kids respect and humility again and again in a world that has very little of either anymore. Just two days ago I took my oldest daughter out to lunch and there was a kid a few booths down drawing on the restaurant’s curtains while the dad just sat that there and watched and the mom was on her phone! I swear some parents don’t even try.

Josh Poland: Knowing that my little girl will grow up. Being a dad isnt hard, knowing that eventually you have to push the birdie out of the nest and you cant protect them anymore. That’s the hardest part.

Brandon Dumoulin: Everything is challenging especially altogether!

To subtle to be an official mic drop, but Aaron Guthrie kinda nails it when he says, ‘The constant struggle to always be a “good enough” dad by those judging around you. Doubting your parental skills because people don’t respect the way you feel things should be done. And the hardest part of it all….is actually learning to not let any of that bother you and just do what you feel is right by yours.”

What’s the hardest part of fatherhood for you? Tell us on Facebook.