Oof, the teenage years of dating and dating Mr. or Miss Wrong. We asked the dads of our Facebook community how they would handle things if they thought their teenager was dating someone who was bad for them. As you might expect, the responses were not tepid.

https://www.facebook.com/lifeofdad/posts/10155208864011427

J.R. Braet: When you say “bad for them” what do you mean? I had some girlfriends who were “bad for me” growing up, but my parents always supported me and let me make my own mistakes. Only after things went south (which they invariably would) would they tell me what they really thought of the girl I had been dating. Sometimes you just have to step back and let your kids figure things out for themselves.

Monica Brooks Wier: Never ever forbid a teen from dating someone. It only makes them rebel. Offer encouragement, welcome the date into the home and be nice, try to get to know them. I’m the mom of three teens (my own two and an extra who lives with us). We mostly just wing it.

Josh Sherman: Your job is primarily to show them what a relationship should look like by treating your s.o. in that manner. And teach them to stay away from legitimately bad things like hard drugs and alcohol abuse. If you’ve done that, then the only reason to step in is if you suspect abuse. Other than that your kid has to live and learn.

Jason Hansen: Trust my kid to ultimately make the right decision for him/her. Offer advice based on my own experiences as well. You cannot learn from mistakes unless you make them.

Ariel Stewart Rolph: Make sure they know they can call you to pick them up from literally anywhere, ANY time. And to always use condoms, even if she’s “on the pill” or he says “they’re too tight”, and that your kid can always say no, and if the other person doesn’t listen, it becomes a hell no I’m calling dad.

And if they’re getting your kid to pay for everything, redirect their allowance to a bank account they can’t access and let them know that the money will be there for them in exactly 1 year. Seriously. I wish my parents had done that for me so badly. $5k down the drain.

Eric Burger: If it was my teenager I’d smother the crap out of them. Invite their shitty partner to everything, become best buds, anything. Get em to dump that person to spite me. An adult all you can do is hope they see the light.

Jared K Brett: Gotta let them live and learn, sometimes the most painful experience can carve the path to a great future. Touch the stove and burn your hand… I’m pretty sure most people won’t touch the stove again.

Justin Kniss: Honesty is the key. My mom tells how she feels but supports me either way. My mother is divorced. Even if she is my mother i still voice my opinion, just support her, take it or leave it.

Tyler F-a: Voice your concerns respectively and with as much sugar coating you can. But leave your child to discover this on their own.

Randy Horton: My wife and I disagree on dating in high school. I’m against it – they will have enough to worry about in high school and need to be more grown-up before dating. My wife wants them to be allowed to date, though she has made comments about choosing their spouses for them (maybe she’s joking…maybe not.)

So if it’s up to me? No dating until college and I will find (legal) aye of making bad people go away.

Brian Hodge: Grown-ups can do what they want, as long as I’m not paying their room, board, insurance, gas, and tuition. Teenagers. Whoever told them they could date was an idiot.

Keith Foxall: I don’t have that trouble. Boyfriends and girlfriend are banned till after university.

Josh Gottschalk: “Bad for them” …..
Emotionally?
Physically?
Financially?
Each type has to be handled differently.

Alex Gomez: Unless there is abuse, don’t meddle in your kid’s relationship.

What would you do if your kid was dating a bad apple? Tell us on Facebook?

Flickr photo by Zorah Olivia, used under Creative Commons license.