There are some very funny parents on the internet, so we decided to round up our favorite tweets of the week from some of the funniest moms and dads on Twitter! We hope you enjoy these as much as we did!
For more Twitter fun, don’t forget to join us over at @LifeofDadShow!
Welcome to parenthood. Everyone’s hungry, just not for that.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) February 19, 2019
My 3yo changed out of pajamas into pajamas because he gets it.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) February 21, 2019
Me: Hey kid what do you want for dinner?
8: Do you have cheese?
Me: yes
8: Do you have ham?
Me: yes
8: Do you have bread and mayo?
Me: YES
8: I want spaghetti
— Cori (@skwunt) February 9, 2019
My son said he could totally survive in the wild because he plays Minecraft. So now I have to do everything in my power to keep him as far as possible from the wild.
— HowToBeADad (@HowToBeADad) February 20, 2019
My son’s favorite thing to do is to hand me important school documents I need to sign while I am driving 60 mph.
On the way to school.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) February 21, 2019
Pretty sure that the tickle fight my kids are having is to the death.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) February 21, 2019
Kids like going bowling because they finally get rewarded for repeatedly destroying things someone else has cleaned up and organized.
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) February 23, 2019
we took our kids on a week-long vaca filled with all kinds of exciting activities but when my son wrote about it for his “winter break journal” all he reported was that he got Sour Patch Kids at the gas station in Pennsylvania so that’s nice
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) February 24, 2019
Crazy how my 3-year-old can expertly maneuver the Android operating system but can’t put on a flip flop.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) February 18, 2019
I found these stashed under my daughter’s pillow. My God, what is she planning? pic.twitter.com/6OysE9B7x7
— Burning Mom (@MomOnFire) February 20, 2019
Me watching the Oscars: Haven’t seen it. Haven’t seen it. Haven’t seen it.
Me watching the Kids’ Choice Awards: TEEN TITANS GO WAS ROBBED— SpacedMom (@copymama) February 25, 2019
One of the most gratifying – and horrifying – things in the world, is waking up to the sound of your kids getting themselves breakfast.
— Life?UɴPιɴтereѕтιɴɢ (@LifeUnPinterest) February 19, 2019
If the apocalypse comes, please let it be before an elementary school recorder recital.
— The Dad Briefs™ (@SladeWentworth) February 22, 2019
A friend wanted to know what it’s like to be a mom, so I busted down her bathroom door while she was taking a shower so I could tell her that I’m thinking about changing the name of one of my stuffed animals.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) February 21, 2019
I want my kids to know they can always talk to me about anything going on in their lives.
Except Fortnite.
— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) February 22, 2019
[At the park]
Me: Hey! Don't pick up trash! Especially since you're always putting your fingers in your mouth!
[My 3 year-old, with a dirty tissue in his mouth]:
I donth anymuh!— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) February 19, 2019
FUN PRANK: Tell your kids they can't play video games on their day off, and then tell your wife you have to work all day.
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) February 18, 2019
My 5yo just informed me that if he grows up to have twins, he's going to give them the same name, if you want to know what level of laziness I'm dealing with
— Salty Mermaid (@Jenn_H_Scott) February 18, 2019
Me *sits down to use toilet*
6yo *sprints in, slams door, locks it*
Toddler *screams* “Open Door!”
6yo *stares at me directly in the eyes* “Give me $5 or else I’m letting her in.”
— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) February 21, 2019
Principal: Do you know why we called you in today?
Parent: Because my kid is sooooo awesome?
Principal:
Parent: It was worth a shot.
— Daddy’s Digest® (@daddysdigest) February 18, 2019